So how'd I do it?

I didn't. Failed the world again. Here's how it all went down:

I was supposed to fall asleep at 3:30 am, sleep till 6:30, wake up son, keep him awake till doc visit. Laid down, when my husband began to try to weasel out of the time he was supposed to have spent off of work that day. See, he was going to take the afternoon off, so I could go, by myself, to the stomach doc.

My husband nneds to work. I know that. But an arrangement is an arrangement and what he wanted, without coming out and saying it, was for me to let him off the hook. That meant I would have to ask for the help again.

And you know what?

Couldn't do it. Could not take having to ask for help.

So, instead of falling asleep at 3:30, I cried in the living room for a half hour, then laid back down where every OCD trait I have decided to play havoc with me until about 5:30. I woke up at 7:15 or so, and even then I intended to take my son. But I was just beat. No more energy, nothing more. Still intended to take him - had to cancel stomach doc visit and decided not to make any other appointments for me that weren't absolutely critical to my survival so I wouldn't need any help at all with anything and, if nothing else, have a little dignity while I went crazy.

Long as you can function and don't burden anyone with it, crazy is ok. It's called eccentricity and I have it down pat, folks.

Woke my son up - and something happened. He was having breakfast, getting ready to go, I was having my morning dose of caffeine and suddenly, it was all too much.

So I failed as a woman, a mother, a person and the universe and rescheduled that appointment for next week.

And then I had a bit of a breakdown this morning. No need for boring details. My son and I are autistic and we don't do change well and if they are going to change your kids homeroom they need to talk to the parents about it ( a rule which was broken) and they need to give the parent time to talk to kid.

Dropped kid off (younger daughter at school taking finals, older daughter home with headache) and parked my car and called husband. We agreed life is full of challenges. I hung up on him, cried and yelled (out loud) and screamed (out loud) for several miles of freeway traffic. Bought some fat and calories and informed husband that if he didn't pick up the kids today I was going to drive my car into a wall. He is on his way home, God Bless him.

And I have found that if you have a shit stomach lining because you've had so many headaches and taken too much ibuproffen, ibuproffen itself becomes the PERFECT form of self abuse. All the pain, none of the scars.

Whee.

Can you believe I am going to spell check this?