Currently This

I remain horrified by what happened in Washington, Pennsylvania and especially New York five years ago. I'm dwarfed and buoyed by the heroism of those who died and the lives of those who have been ravaged by health issues because they did their jobs and the government lied to them when it told them it was safe to do that. They all deserve to be remembered and honored.

But I am overwhelmed by the amount of coverage as we near each anniversary. Every channel, every radio station and most of the Internet (including me) devotes itself to the memoriam with its never ending supply of images and sound bytes from 911 calls. Because I remain riveted and because I feel it is a debt I need to honor, I watch a certain amount. Then I need to turn it all off because there is only so much pain I can stand before I find myself feeling inured and angry. As they apply to that day, it worries me to be either.

Update: A few minutes ago, my daughter came to me in tears. She is afraid to go to school tomorrow because of the recent bin Ladin tapes where he discusses the five year anniversary. She's worried because, as she puts it, everything in this country happens in one of two places and he already hit one.

Apologies to the rest of the country who think theirs is the only really happening state. She's right though. Los Angeles is a worrisome target, given that the Port of Los Angeles is the biggest port in America. Last year 3,956,053 containers came through that port. According to CNN, only five percent of those are checked for suspicious stuff. That means that of the roughly 11,000 containers to come into the port tomorrow, only 550 will be inspected. That leaves 10,450 more. If just one of those contains a nuclear weapon, all of us in this house right now will be dead in the firestorm, regardless of where we are when the bomb goes off.

That's a lot to be scared of. No wonder she wants to stay home. Frankly, I want to let her. I want to hole up in our home with my family tomorrow and just stay safe. But that's the point. They, the terrorists both abroad and in our own government, want us to huddle frightened in our house. Not just tomorrow, but every day. They want us so scared that we're willing to let them do anything, give up any freedom, if they will just lie to us some more and tell us everything is OK.

But the truth is, if some phantom terrorist wants to get us, they will (most likely with help from our own government, but that's a post for another time). They aren't going to do it when we're watching for it, either. They aren't going to tell us the day it's coming. That isn't scary. They'll wait till we are relaxed and complacent, then nail us. The loud noise is scary because we weren't expecting it and EVERYONE thinks something will happen tomorrow.

I want to let her stay home because she's afraid and crying and my own fears make me want to huddle, but it would be the worst thing I could do. I can't give in to my fears and teach her to give in to hers. We are all going to go on with our day tomorrow and no terrorist, not in Afghanistan on Washington, is going to scare us into staying home.